☑ Make a checklist. ☑ Feed the cat. ☐ Be psychologically stable.
☑ Make a check list.
☑ Put the chores of the day.
☑ Feed the cat.
☐ Do the laundry.
☑ Holly mother of ticks! It works!
☑ Put more chores! More! MOAR!
☑ Organize my closet.
☐ Cook for the next week.
☑ Okay, maybe put more realistic chores.
☑ Watch Netflix!
☐ Should this go in the check list?
☐ Probably no. Right?
☑ Nah.. Okay. I shouldn’t lose it now. Put some other chores.
☑ Stop watching Netflix.
☑ Call mom.
☑ Call mom again.
☑ What happened to mom?
☐ Stop worrying about mom.
☑ Call mom once more.
☑ Distract yourself. Continue with the check list.
☑ Take out the trash.
☑ Buy anchovies and artichokes from the grocery store.
☐ Drink 8 glasses of water.
☑ Mommy! Hang in there! I am coming to save you!
☐ Take my suit from the dry cleaner on Friday.
☑ Where the fuck are my car keys? Where the fuck are my car keys? Wher-
☑ Clean the oven.
☐ Buy a new door mat. Preferably black or maybe dark brown this time (?).
☑ Faster you slow-ass car. Faster! Fast- Why is the service light on again?
☑ Take the car for service.
☑ Come on — Come on — Come on. ALMOST THERE…
☑ Fix the kitchen chair. (The blue one, not the green one.)
☐ Okay-okay-okay!! MOM!!! OPEN THE DOOR!
☑ Buy carrots and cabbages from the farmers market.
☐ ARE YOU OKAY?
☑ Buy a present for auntie Christine’s wedding.
☐ WHY YOU DID NOT ANSWER MY CALLS?
☐ Eat 5 greens. Start with a banana and two apples.
☐ SERIOUSLY NOW?
☑ Watch the coding tutorial from work.
☐ Make my PowerPoint presentation for Rogers. He wants animations, too.
☑ FUCKING TEACH MOM HOW TO DEACTIVATE SILENT MODE.
☑ Buy wine.
☑ Seriously. A lot.
☐ Book a meeting with my therapist.
☐ Make a check list for tomorrow.
☐ Survive the hangover.
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